Day 193 - "Free to be Me!"

Tuesday, 5 June 2007
Day 193 - "Free to be Me!"

One of my friends invited me to go away for the weekend at the end of the month – to Cape Town. Now, this is a trip more a 1700kms from home and includes my very first plane flight - anywhere. Of course, since “the heroin addiction” I have not taken a trip anywhere from home especially not with somebody my parents hardly knew.

At the moment I still have to ask my parents if I as much as want to go to the shop around the corner, so I figured that going away to Cape Town for a weekend would most certainly warrant some mention and would probably raise concerns. I was really surprised that all my worry about asking them was really needless in the end when they agreed without argument.

The plane tickets have been bought, the car has been rented, so I guess it is really official. There is no turning back now. I can’t wait to see Cape Town again and will undoubtedly see some of my family members. I feel like I’m ready to explode with excitement. And even though I have no doubt that Cape Town, the people, the venues and the scenery is all contributing to this ignition of feelings, there is another more important reason…

I want to live a normal life again, perhaps live a normal life for the very first time in my life. I want to be free… free from longing, wanting or taking drugs. And this trip marks a lot of that for me. It is not so much about me actually going – it is about being trusted enough to let me go, to be liked enough for me to be invited and to feel comfortable enough inside to actually do it!