Day 71/53 – “Drive-Thru”

Friday, 2 February 2007 – Day 71/53 – “Drive-Thru”

“How can I get drugs…? Let me count the ways…” I was always amazed at how resourceful a drug addict could be. No matter what the boundaries were they put up I found some way to get around it and score.

I haven’t specifically mentioned this before but my mom and I work together at the same company. Infact, we sit across from each other. This testifies to the cunningness I demonstrated while taking heroin all those months. But when it came time to get clean it worked to my benefit. Having a parent so close by not only to keep a watch but to listen and to comfort me – really helped!

I had a different approach to the recovery from what I saw in other people. Their responses to help were ‘Leave me alone. It’s got nothing to do with you. What do you know? What do you care?’ it was typical stubborn behavior of an addict that didn’t want to get clean. I did it differently. I wanted help and I accepted and appreciated it when I got it. I worked with the people trying to help me and not against them as many others did. But it was only to a point – to the point where the craving kicked in. Then nothing else mattered, all I wanted, all I needed from anybody was heroin!

And getting heroin, getting any drugs is easy especially in this small city. It is more of a mission to buy bread at the local supermarket than it is to get drugs. You make one call and conveniently get the dealer at the pickup point in the area. You don’t get out of the car – you just do the transaction through the window and done! No parking! No Car Guards! No getting out! No queues! Simpler than buying a bread!

So, as we explore reasons for my drug taking I realize that much of the use over the years were purely because of boredom and very much convenience. Sounds like two of the stupidest reasons to throw your life away – but hey, nobody said the reasons were supposed to be smart!